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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29757984">ardently arrogant and arrogantly ardent</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/HannahPelham/pseuds/HannahPelham'>HannahPelham</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>MASH (TV), Pride and Prejudice &amp; Related Fandoms, Pride and Prejudice (1995), Pride and Prejudice (2005), Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>F/M, MASH Pride and Prejudice AU, and Hawkeye is Darcy, in that Hot Lips is Lizzie, this isn't great at all</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 23:28:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,905</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29757984</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/HannahPelham/pseuds/HannahPelham</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The lives of the Houlihan sisters are changed forever when Mr Hunnicutt and Mr Pierce arrive in the neighbourhood. </p><p>A Not Fantastic M*A*S*H Pride and Prejudice AU</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>B. J. Hunnicutt/Peg Hunnicutt, Charles Emerson Winchester III/Original Female Character(s), Louise McIntyre/"Trapper" John McIntyre, Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan/Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hello there! I figured I should explain vaguely who is who and what's going on. For a start, in this, the names Peg, Margaret, and Margie are all just names in their own right. Erin is also no longer B. J.'s daughter, she is now his sister. It is a very bad Pride and Prejudice AU but hopefully the characters will be recognisable enough, any constructive criticism is most welcome! I hope you enjoy it</p><p>Anything you recognise from either the original Austen, the 1995 TV series, or the 2005 film are not mine - copyright goes to the original owners</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div>
<p></p></div><p>
  <span>“My dear Mr Houlihan, have you heard? Mill Valley Hall is let at last!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mr Houlihan replied that he had not.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have just had it from Mrs Baker that it is taken by a young man by the name of Hunnicutt, a young single man of large fortune!” Mrs Houlihan exclaimed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mr Houlihan was most aggrieved to find that all his wife spoke of as they returned from church was Mr Hunnicutt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What a fantastic opportunity for our girls!”  She said as she handed her bonnet to the maid. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How so?” Mr Houlihan replied.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh Mr Houlihan, you must know I’m thinking of his marrying one of them!” his wife replied, vexed, though not surprised, by her husband’s behaviour.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mr Houlihan did not reply, he simply raised his eyebrows at his second eldest daughter, and retired to his book room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You have no compassion for my poor nerves!” Mrs Houlihan exclaimed. Her eldest daughters raised their eyebrows, whilst the youngest two shrieked along with their mother. The middle had already wandered off towards the piano.  </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peg and Margaret Houlihan, the eldest two daughters of Mr and Mrs Houlihan, followed slowly behind their mother. They loved her, of course, but they would be the second to admit (behind their father) that she was an incredibly silly woman. Margaret, the favourite of her father, had come to feel very strongly that men of sense did not want silly wives. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>That evening, once everyone had calmed down regarding this new and mysterious Mr Hunnicutt, Margaret and Peg retired to the safety of the candlelight of their bedroom.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It shall be you, Peg, you know? Mama is sure you are the prettiest of all of us, and with a large fortune, Mama shall declare that only the prettiest shall do” Margaret said as she plaited her sister’s hair ready for bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have no interest in his fortune, Margaret, you know that” Peg replied, “I should like very much to marry for love”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Margaret smiled at her sister in the mirror. Of all the Houlihan girls, Peg was the prettiest and most agreeable. If she struggled to find somebody to love her, then none of the rest of them had a hope. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And so you shall, you are so amiable every man you come across is half in love with you in seconds, which is why I shall die an old maid”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The sisters swapped seats, and Peg started work on her sister’s hair. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“One day, Margaret, somebody will catch your eye and you will have to hold your tongue”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Margaret smiled weakly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You may marry for love, Peg, and I shall endeavour to marry well. When Papa dies, the house will not go to any of us, at least one of us shall have to marry very well indeed to support the family so Mama does not starve in the hedgerows, as she believes” She said. Peg tied the ribbon into her sister’s hair and blew out the candle. Which Houlihan sister would be thrust towards Mr Hunnicutt was a problem for the morning.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Morning came far too soon for Margaret’s liking, and with it the screams and shrieks of her unsurprisingly hysterical mother. When Margaret reached the drawing room, she soon heard what the problem was. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mrs Houlihan sat in her chair, wailing and waving her handkerchief. Margaret looked to her sisters for an explanation. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mr Hunnicutt is arrived at Mill Valley Hall” Roberta, the second youngest, started. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And!” Louise, the youngest, continued, “Sir Henry Blake has already called upon him!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Margaret made a vague noise of interest as she joined Peg at the table. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why should we care? It is not as if we are going to be acquainted with him, thanks to your father” Mrs Houlihan said bitterly, glaring over towards her husband. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Louise and Roberta explained to Margaret and Peg that Mr Hunnicutt had told Sir Henry that he would attend the next ball at the town assembly rooms that saturday evening. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I am sick of hearing of Mr Hunnicutt!” Mrs Houlihan exclaimed loudly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well that is a shame” her husband replied casually, from behind his copy of Sir Thomas More’s Utopia.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Whatever do you mean Mr Houlihan?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“If I’d have known that was the case, I shouldn’t have called on him this morning” Mr Houlihan said, not looking up. Mrs Houlihan squealed with joy. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh my dear Mr Houlihan, isn’t he such a good father to you, girls?” She exclaimed, leaping up to kiss her husband’s cheek. It was astonishing to everybody except the Houlihan family themselves how quickly Mrs Houlihan could go from childish contempt to complete adoration for her husband. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The ball that saturday night at the assembly rooms turned out to be a very jolly party indeed. The Houlihan girls danced with all the eligible men in the room, but everything was overshadowed by the wait for the appearance of Mr Hunnicutt. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The room was stunned into silence when Mr Hunnicutt did arrive. He was a tall, blonde, broad shouldered man with a charming smile and fashionable clothes. On his arm was a smaller, daintier, even blonder woman, with a sickly smile which clearly was an attempt to hide her contempt for the country dance. Behind them stood a man with even finer clothes, with dark hair and piercing blue eyes. He did not smile, he simply looked around the room with little-disguised disgust. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Sir Henry Blake, the town’s most eminent member since his elevation to the knighthood, introduced himself to them, and the party began again.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Margie Blake, Sir Henry’s unmarried daughter of seven-and-twenty, was a particular friend of Margaret’s. She explained to Peg and Margaret that the woman was Mr Hunnicutt’s sister Erin, and that the man was one of his oldest friends, Mr Pierce of Crabapple Abbey, Derbyshire. They watched as Mr Pierce surveyed the room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It is said he has an income of 10,000 a year and owns half of Derbyshire” Margie said, trying her best to not be overheard by Mrs Houlihan, who would surely shriek loudly at hearing of such a sum. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The miserable half” Margaret murmured, as she turned her head to follow Pierce around the room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Unfortunately for everybody within earshot, Mrs Houlihan had in fact heard of Mr Pierce’s great wealth, and was loudly trying to make out his character. Peg and Margaret found themselves called over to her, as Sir Henry approached with Mr Hunnicutt.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Mr Hunnicutt, may I present Mrs Houlihan and her two eldest daughters, Miss Peg Houlihan and Miss Margaret Houlihan” Sir Henry said, smiling widely as Mr Hunnicutt bowed and the Misses Houlihan curtseyed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>The minute Peg made eye contact with Mr Hunnicutt, she swore she was in love. His face had a gentility and kindness Peg rarely saw, the kind of face that made one want to know more instantly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Mr Hunnicutt was equally charmed by Peg. He swore he had never seen a young woman so beautiful, so elegant, and so simply perfect as Miss Peg Houlihan. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“A pleasure to meet you Mrs Houlihan, Miss Houlihan, Miss Margaret” Mr Hunnicutt said. Peg found his deep baritone voice to be the sweetest sound she’d ever heard. She couldn’t take her eyes off him, and he couldn’t take his eyes off of her. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He half-listened to Mrs Houlihan talking, managing a polite laugh in all the right places, but all he could think of was how to ask Peg to dance. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Miss Houlihan?” He asked, slightly surprising himself, “Might I be so bold as to claim the first two dances?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Peg couldn’t believe it. Not only did he want to dance with her, but claiming two dances certainly showed intent. She smiled widely and nodded, and placed her hand gently in the crook of his elbow. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Peg danced with Mr Hunnicutt, Margaret and Margie watched Mr Pierce from across the room. He stood with Mr Hunnicutt’s sister and watched with discontent as his friend danced with Peg. Mr Pierce could not have looked any more disagreeable if he had tried. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t care how rich he is, Margie, he’s clearly a very arrogant man, a country dance is obviously beneath him” Margaret said, raising her eyebrows at her friend. They laughed quietly and continued chatting, an eye always watching Mr Pierce, and his lack of good humour. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before she knew it, the dances had passed, and Peg was being led off to a corner of the room by Mr Hunnicutt. She would follow him anywhere, if he asked, she thought. As it turned out, Peg was led to the corner of the room where Mr Hunnicutt’s sister was standing, surveying the scene. She and Peg curtseyed politely </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Miss Houlihan”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Miss Hunnicutt”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Miss Houlihan, this is my sister Erin” Mr Hunnicutt introduced, anxious to get rid of any air of animosity as soon as possible. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Charmed, I’m sure” Erin replied coolly. Mr Hunnicutt smiled, unable to hear the sarcasm in his sister’s voice, and left the women alone. He found himself in the opposite corner of the room, with Mr Pierce. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I have never seen so many handsome girls in all my life” Mr Hunnicutt commented as they watched the dancing. Mr Pierce almost sneered. He wasn’t sure he’d seen any beauty, except perhaps the eldest Houlihan girl. Pierce considered himself a reserved man, he did not like dancing, and he certainly did not like attending country dances. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“The eldest Miss Houlihan, I suppose, is something of a beauty” Mr Pierce conceded, glancing across the room once more. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She is the most beautiful creature I have ever beheld, Pierce” Hunnicutt replied, staring in Peg’s direction. He caught her eye briefly, and smiled brightly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She is the only handsome girl in the room” Pierce replied quickly. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Her sister Margaret is very agreeable, is she not?” Hunnicutt said. He’d thought that the second eldest Miss Houlihan was the second most beautiful sister, and could see why she was known as a local beauty, along with Peg. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“She is tolerable, I suppose, but not handsome enough to tempt me” Pierce replied, as he caught Margaret’s eye. He was shocked to find she had very beautiful eyes indeed. </span>
</p>
<p></p><div>
  <p> </p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div>
  <p></p>
  <div class="resolved">
    <p> </p>
  </div>
</div><p>
  <span>Longbourn was aflutter with talk of Mr Hunnicutt for hours the next day. All Mr Houlihan heard was about how gracious Mr Hunnicutt had been, dancing with Peg for half the evening and talking with her for the rest of  it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“He is just what a young man ought to be” Mrs Houlihan declared, as she sat down at the breakfast table. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Mr Houlihan sighed, and lifted his newspaper up in front of his face. He wasn’t really reading it, but he hoped it would stop anybody talking to him for a good few hours. Besides, the only person’s opinion on Mr Hunnicutt that really mattered to him was Margaret’s, and she was sitting quietly watching the scene play out. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was quite a different scene playing out at Mill Valley Hall. Whilst Mr Hunnicutt had thought every person charming, and Miss Peg Houlihan the most charming by a country mile, none of the others of the party were in agreement with him. He’d seen many beautiful girls, many charming young men, and many seemingly lovely families.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Erin Hunnicutt had found the whole thing vile. None of the women had been appropriately demure, saving their smiles for the right man. They had grinned and laughed and shrieked as they danced, making exhibitions of themselves. Erin was of the firm opinion that she would dance when she was asked, but otherwise she should stay still or walk the room, as her figure greatly benefited from calm and serenity. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And those Houlihan girls” She said as she sipped her tea, “outrageous behaviour from all of them, and their mother! What a ridiculous woman!”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Mr Pierce thought deeply. He’d liked Peg Houlihan, as she was quieter and more refined than any other young lady on offer in country society that he’d encountered. She was pretty, delicate, feminine, but her family left a great deal to be desired.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“The eldest Miss Houlihan, I will admit,” Pierce said, “is very pretty, but she smiles too much”. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Pierce saw Hunnicutt’s face fall slightly, and he tried to send a comforting smile in his friend’s direction. Erin laughed loudly, shrieking like one of the Houlihans she already detested. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And Miss Margaret Houlihan, I heard, is considered a local beauty. What say you, Mr Pierce?” Erin asked, smirking at Pierce. She had always thought subtlety was her strong suit, but everyone who saw her in the same room as him knew she had designs on becoming the next mistress of Crabapple Abbey.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I should sooner call her mother a wit” Pierce replied, trying not to think of the pair of very fine eyes he’d found in the possession of Margaret Houlihan. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The woman in question was not thinking about Mr Pierce, nor had she thought about him much for most of the day. As she lay awake, she looked over at her sister asleep next to her. Peg was smiling in her sleep, no doubt dreaming of Mr Hunnicutt. Margaret saw no harm in Peg liking Mr Hunnicutt, she had liked many a stupider man before. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Margaret was able to form more of an opinion on Mr Hunnicutt when Sir Henry and Lady Blake held a small dance and cards evening the next week. It was the usual chaos of Meryton, Mrs Houlihan gossiping and chatting with anybody in earshot, Gwendoline Houlihan was playing the piano much to everybody’s chagrin, and Margaret was in the corner with Margie. There was a new addition in the form of the local Militia, and the youngest two Houlihan sisters were beside themselves with excitement. They had found a young, impressionable soldier called O’Reilly and were dragging him around the room with him, embarrassing both O’Reilly and the other Houlihans greatly.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Margaret was very surprised to find Mr Pierce in attendance, but she supposed he was there as a favour to Mr Hunnicutt, who was deep in conversation with Peg in the corner. As it was, Margaret spent most of her evening not far from Peg, chatting with Margie about whatever their minds could come up with. She and Margie were very similar souls, and with Margie nearing eight-and-twenty, it was unlikely that she would marry, and she seemed content with that. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“With a brother so charming as Mr Hunnicutt, it is a surprise to find Miss Hunnicutt so….” Margie started, trying to be polite. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Disagreeable?” Margaret replied. She did not mind being scathing in the slightest. As far as she was concerned, what she’d seen of Erin Hunnicutt had not flattered her in any way, so she didn’t intend to flatter her when there was no need. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She had absolutely no intention of flattering Mr Pierce either. She watched as he stood in the corner brooding, much like he had at the assembly rooms. In fact, Margaret thought he may even be wearing the same clothes. She decided he was nothing if not consistent. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Well, she had thought he was consistent until he walked over to her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Miss Houlihan, would you dance with me?” He asked, surprising Margaret greatly. She fumbled for a second. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I, uh, I am not up to dancing this evening Mr Pierce, I do apologise” Margaret replied, trying to find any excuse not to dance with him. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Pierce bowed politely, and made his way over to Erin Hunnicutt.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I know what you’re thinking, Mr Pierce” she said as he reached her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I highly doubt that” He replied quickly.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Erin smirked, she was sure she could tell. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re thinking about how insufferable this whole evening is, and how you should much rather be dancing with a society lady at Almack’s” She said, sure of herself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Now it was Pierce’s turn to smirk. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“In fact, no, I’ve been meditating about what a pair of fine eyes can bestow” He replied, glancing quickly in Margaret’s direction. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Any eyes in particular, Mr Pierce?” Erin asked, her eyes full of hope that he would say her name.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Miss Margaret Houlihan’s” He replied quickly. Erin was speechless. Of all the women in the room for Pierce to single out, she could hardly believe he had singled her out. She, of the shrieking, screaming, embarrassing Houlihans. She, of the reputed but undeserving title of local beauty. Why should her eyes, which Erin thought dull, have caught the attention of Mr Pierce over her own? She tried not to let her devastation show as she floated about the room, trying to give it some air of grace.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>When a letter arrived at Longbourn the next morning for Peg, everyone assumed it was from Mr Hunnicutt. It was, however, from Erin Hunnicutt instead. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Erin Hunnicutt has invited me to dine with her” Peg smiled, “but her brother will be dining out”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Mrs Houlihan was delighted, if Peg was already being invited to dine at Mill Valley Hall by Mr Hunnicutt’s family, surely that was a sign of Mr Hunnicutt’s own seriousness about her. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Can I have the carriage, Mama?” Peg asked, smiling widely at her mother in the hopes she would get her way. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Certainly not,” Mrs Houlihan replied, to the shock of everybody, “you shall go on horseback”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peg almost screamed in surprise. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“But Mama!” Margaret exclaimed. She could hardly believe what she was hearing, even from her ridiculous mother. Peg sighed heavily and left the room. Mrs Houlihan glanced out of the window and smiled. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It looks like rain, and then she shall have to stay the night” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As it was, when Peg did arrive at Mill Valley Hall, she was soaked to the skin and sneezing. She was rushed upstairs to an empty bedroom, of which there were many, and word was sent back to Longbourn that she had caught a cold.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>In a letter the next day, Peg declared that</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Except a sore throat, a fever, and a headache, there is nothing much wrong with me</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Margaret was furious that Mrs Houlihan had made this happen. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Mr Houlihan was distinctly more subdued.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, if Peg should die of this fever, it is a comfort to know that it was in pursuit of Mr Hunnicutt”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The next day, Margaret set out early to walk to Mill Valley Hall, to check on Peg. She had hardly slept with worry. Roberta, their second youngest sister, had never enjoyed robust health, so whenever anybody else in the family fell ill, there was a worry they would suffer like Roberta did. Margaret had to go and check on Peg, lest she make herself sick with worry. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She did not see another soul until she reached the grounds of Mill Valley Hall itself, where she ran into the last person she wanted to see.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Mr Pierce!” She said,  trying to look as unperturbed as possible. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Miss Houlihan” He replied, trying to muster up something of a smile. Neither said anything for a moment, unsure of how to proceed. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I have come to see my sister” Margaret said, once the silence had become sufficiently awkward. Mr Pierce nodded and gestured towards the house. He led her through the grounds, and as far as the entrance hall. From there, a servant led Margaret through the winding corridors to Peg’s room.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Did you see her hem? Six inches deep in mud and her cheeks flushed and red, she looked positively wild!” Erin commented when the subject of Margaret’s visit was brought up. She’d seen Margaret through the window and swore she had never seen a muddier or more disheveled woman in her life. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“She was, perhaps, not at her best after walking, but her eyes were brightened by the exercise” Pierce replied, hardly noticing his comment about her eyes. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“All the exercise from walking must surely help her figure, no?” Mr Hunnicutt suggested, trying to calm the scathing of his sister. He liked Margaret a lot, and wanted the Hunnicutts to be liked by her, and all the Houlihans, so he could be free to fall in love with Peg. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>He then realised that it was a bit late for that, as he was half in love with Peg already.  </span>
</p>

<p></p><div>
  <p> </p>
</div>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>In which we meet Mr Winchester the country Parson and Captain John McIntyre of the Militia</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Un-betad, we die like men.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div>
  <p></p>
  <div class="resolved">
    <p> </p>
  </div>
</div><p>
  <span>“Miss Houlihan, I hope you will stay until your sister is well again?” Mr Hunnicutt asked tentatively, as Margaret left her sister’s sick bed for a moment. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you Mr Hunnicutt, that is most kind” Margaret replied, smiling a little. She was glad to be staying near Peg, keeping an eye on her, but she would rather do that without the presence of Mr Pierce and Miss Hunnicutt. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And so, Margaret spent three very awkward days at Mill Valley Hall, mostly in the company of Erin Hunnicutt. Margaret sat reading in the very beautiful drawing room most of the time, whilst Erin endeavoured to look beautiful. More often than not, Mr Pierce joined them to write letters, and Margaret knew Erin was trying to make herself alluring to him. She didn’t know if Erin genuinely had affection for Mr Pierce, or whether she just wanted the Pierce fortune, but either way, it wasn’t working. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Who are you writing to, Mr Pierce?” Erin asked, halfway through the second day. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“My sister” Pierce replied quickly, trying to concentrate on the sentence he was writing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh how is dear Sarah? I long to see her” Erin exclaimed.</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Pierce smiled briefly, “She is well, becoming more accomplished by the day”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Truly accomplished women are a rare breed these days, are they not, Mr Pierce?” Erin asked. She smirked. She knew exactly what she was doing. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I confess at knowing only, perhaps, a half dozen” Pierce replied, not looking up from his letter. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Mr Hunnicutt smiled blithely through it all, unaware of his sister’s attempt to draw a compliment from Mr Pierce. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And what, Mr Pierce, would you consider the requirements of an accomplished woman?” Margaret asked. As much as she was trying her hardest to be nice and fit in whilst Peg recovered, when such a perfect opportunity to kick the hornet’s nest that was Mr Pierce came up, she couldn’t not take it. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“She must be a fine artist, a fine musician or singer, speak at least two languages fluently, amongst other things” Pierce said, turning to look over towards the women in the room. Margaret raised her eyebrows behind her book. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“What say you, Miss Houlihan?” Erin asked, noticing the strange exchange of expressions between her and Pierce. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I am simply surprised at Mr Pierce’s knowing half a dozen accomplished women, I can hardly believe he knows any” Margaret replied. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you so severe on your own sex?” Pierce asked, surprised that Margaret would be so scathing, but also surprised that he was surprised by that. Surely if he had learnt anything about Margaret Houlihan by now, it was that she was a tad unpredictable. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I never saw such a woman” Margaret replied, turning back to her book. Pierce turned back around to his letter, and Erin sat there stunned at what she’d just seen. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>By the time Peg left Mill Valley Hall, the next evening, a ball had been agreed on, with Peg naming the day once she was well. Mrs Houlihan and the other Houlihan sisters had visited, and naturally Louise and Roberta had managed to convince Mr Hunnicutt to hold a ball, to show his good intentions towards the neighbourhood, and to Peg. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>The excitement of the ball, however, was dampened when Mr Houlihan received a letter. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Mrs Houlihan, tell the cook to expect an addition to our party this evening” He said, over breakfast, from behind the letter. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh Mr Bingley! Peg, you sly girl, you never said a word!” Mrs Houlihan shrieked, before Mr Houlihan could explain the contents of the letter. The younger girls giggled along with their mother, until Mr Houlihan let out a large sigh. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“It is from a man I never met in my whole life. My cousin, Mr Winchester, who will inherit this house when I die and turn you out into the hedgerows. He says here he wishes to heal the rift caused by his late father betwixt myself and him, and that since his ordination at easter he has been, and I quote, distinguished by the patronage of the Right Honourable Lady Mildred Potter, who has given him a living at the Parsonage connected to her estate at Jefferson Park. He says he wishes to be a model for the community, and therefore will come and stay with us sevenight to heal the rift”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Mr Winchester arrived that afternoon. From the minute the carriage arrived outside the house, Margaret knew it would be an agonising week. From the smarmy grin to the drab clothes to the constant proselytising. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“My esteemed patroness Lady Mildred Potter has very extensive property, such finery to be seen at Jefferson Park” Mr Winchester continued, having been speaking for most of the dinner so far, “and it shall all be left to her daughter, Emily, a sickly girl but elegance upon elegance”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Margaret and Peg made eye contact across the table as Louise sighed loudly. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I do believe I am one to well flatter a lady” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“And do you study up on such phrases, or do they come naturally?” Mrs Houlihan asked, giving her husband a death stare down the dinner table. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“I rely on the mood of the moment, Mrs Houlihan, one such as I does not need to practice being tasteful and graceful” Mr Winchester replied, smiling that sickly smile of his towards Mrs Houlihan. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh believe me Mr Winchester, nobody would accuse your manners of being rehearsed” Margaret muttered, making both Peg and Louise laugh. Louise managed to cover her laughing with a cough, and Peg tried to be as quiet as possible. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>It was clear within hours of Mr Winchester’s arrival that his true purpose in visiting was, in fact, to choose a wife from Mr Houlihan’s five daughters, so that Winchester could be a model for his parish, and so the Houlihans would have a reason to stay at Longbourn after Mr Houlihan’s death, and Mr Winchester’s subsequent inheritance. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Perhaps naturally, Mr Winchester started to single out the eldest and prettiest Houlihan daughter as the object of his affection. It was exceedingly awkward for everybody involved. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Mrs Houlihan” Mr Winchester said quietly one evening, “I do not know whether it has garnered your attention, my reason for being here, it is the wish of my esteemed patroness Lady Mildred that I find a wife, and I have singled out the eldest Miss Houlihan as th-”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Oh Mr Winchester,” Mrs Houlihan interrupted, “I am afraid that the eldest Miss Houlihan, we hope, is very soon to be engaged”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Engaged?”</span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“But Miss Margaret, next to her in both age and beauty, would be a fine wife for anybody” Mrs Houlihan suggested. She knew it would be hard to marry Margaret off to somebody, and this may just be the opportunity she was looking for. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>And so, Mr Winchester turned his attention to Margaret, and his attentions in that direction were as unwelcome as they had been when they were directed towards Peg. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>As they walked into Meryton the next morning, Margaret tried her hardest to keep away from Mr Winchester. He’d hardly left her with a moment to herself from the moment she’d emerged from her bedroom, and didn’t seem to be the giving up type. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>They reached Meryton, and Margaret had never been more grateful for her younger sisters’ fascination for soldiers. Roberta and Louise ran over to Lt O’Reilly, who was standing with two other gentlemen in uniform. One of them, tall, well built, with curly blonde hair and a cheeky grin, particularly caught Margaret’s eye. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Peg and Margaret made their way over, trailed faithfully by Mr Winchester. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“Captain, may I present Miss Peg Houlihan, Miss Margaret Houlihan, Miss Roberta Houlihan, and Miss Louise Houlihan” Lt. O’Reilly said, gesturing towards each sister in turn, “This is Captain McIntyre, he has just joined us” </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Captain McIntyre smiled and kissed the hand of each of the sisters, flashing a smile at Margaret as he did so. Margaret blushed ever so slightly, and sent up a silent prayer, begging that Roberta and Louise wouldn’t notice. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Within seconds, Captain McIntyre had been invited to the card and dance evening that Sir Henry and Lady Blake were holding that evening. As it was, everyone was exceedingly grateful to have a new, handsome Militia Captain to talk to and about, as Mr Winchester was being thoroughly himself. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“This fireplace indeed reminds me of the one in the great room of Jefferson Park, though it of course is a great deal larger than this…” He said to Sir Henry, who couldn’t tell whether it was an insult or a compliment. Margaret smiled from her chair and tried to keep half an eye on her younger sisters, who had roped poor Lt O’Reilly into playing cards. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>She was quite content on her own, taking in the scene and observing, but when Captain McIntyre interrupted, it certainly wasn’t unwelcome. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>“May I, Miss Houlihan?” He asked, as he sat down. The question was redundant in it’s content, but as a way of starting conversation with a pretty young woman, Captain McIntyre found it priceless. </span>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <span>Margaret smiled and blushed as he sat down, and she wondered when she became the sort of person who blushed at the sight of a man in uniform. </span>
</p>

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